Discovering skills and passion

What really cranks you up?  What makes you passionate to cast the cares of life aside and just dive in?  Is there something that you could spend long hours doing, and time stands still because you are totally engrossed?  And is there something that you come away from feeling energized, revitalized, enthusiastic about life because of it?

I am never clear if i am obsessive compulsive or if it is normal to become so engrossed in something that you dont realize hours have passed.  I must tell you that since we moved into the studio I returned to silk painting on a frame, and time itself has stood still for me while i am painting.  The seduction of paint applied to thirsty silk that just absorbes and spreads the color beautifully is wonderful… and the opportunity to watch white silk transform into something so much more is mesmerizing.

Many years ago i took a class on silk painting.  That is what began to awaken the artist hidden under the many layers of my life.  The Artist was always there, just not give as much freedom to be and create.  Its funny that i remember clearly saying to the person who invited me to the class “Silk Painting, Really? I dont think so. .. Painting is not my strength… I did miserable at watercolor, and was not so talented at acrylic.  Are you really sure?”  and she insisted i join her.  I don’t regret that class.  I went on to make a dozen scarves in the french resist method, but began to notice flaws… paint overflowed a spot, or bled over into other areas… the perfection was gone.  The obsessive compulsive perfectionist in me was not having it… so i retreated to shibori for many years.

Well back to our studio – i now had a huge surface to lay out the frame, and be able to work with adequate space.  It took courage to say I will overcome that desire for perfection… and just create, and let it develop.  And there it was…. i realized how much my passion has grown regarding my silk when it was 10:15pm and i was still in the studio, and had not even eaten dinner…..

But there it is… get a victory over one thing, and another part of life slips out of control. I wont trade my adventures in the studio for anything… Silk painting has been teaching me to challenge everything, press hard forward, and to make an intentional decision to be courageous, and dare greatly.